What does Love mean to you? To me in my life it has meant many things. It has meant Joy, Happiness, and unbearable heart break.   What does it mean to fall in love?  Is Love the short-term answer to a relationship?  Is it something we say to establish trust? Is it something we say to gain physical pleasure?  It is True? Is there really such a thing as true Love? Or is it fleeting?  I look back on my life and the relationships I have been in and I wonder, what made them work and what made them fail.  Sometimes I try to find my answers in the music lyrics to tell the stories of my life and loves.  

In my life I see where I’ve been
I said that I’d never fall again
Within myself I was wrong
My searchin’ ain’t over… over
I know that

When you love a woman
You see your world inside her eyes
When you love a woman
You know she’s standin’ by your side
A joy that lasts forever

In my life after a couple of failed relationships I met someone, by chance.  I didn’t expect it and I wasn’t looking for it. Yet it hit me out of nowhere.  It gave me a feeling that I had never really ever felt before and probably will never feel again.  Never is a long time they say.  But for me it will seem like forever.  When you love a woman, you see your world inside her eyes.  She stood beside me through some tough times and that was the joy that I hoped would last forever.  But as in anything in life, sometimes situations are complicated and then the Love you though would last forever is gone.  Forever? I hope not.  

I guess whoever said “the grass is greener”
Must’ve never seen the other side
And “what don’t kill you makes you stronger”
Sure sounds like a lie
And whoever said that “time heals everything and everything will be alright”
Whoever said “it ain’t the end of the world and you’ll find somebody new”
Must’ve never met you

So now I embark on a chapter of my life that I thought would never happen.  Although I always knew it probably would end up this way.  Like I said when that special someone was your first thought when you opened your eyes in the morning and the last thought when you closed them for the night’s sleep it is difficult to come to grips with how you want the rest of your life to go.  Friends will say you will be alright.  It wasn’t meant to be.  “What don’t kill you makes you stronger?”  Well I am not sure about that.  “Time heals everything and everything will be alright?”  I am not sure about that either.  Looking for something I needed I was looking through a box in the basement and I found a card she gave me.  The title of the card was “Why I Love You.”  She wrote “This is all the Time!  The card said “You listen when I talk” You don’t judge me for my weirdness”  “We hate the same people and things” “You smell good” and the biggest of all “You make me laugh” 

In the inside of the card was written “You made me laugh and smile!”  Printed was “There’s no measure for How much I love you”  

Whoever said “it ain’t the end of the world and you’ll find somebody new”
Must’ve never met you

So now it’s time to move on with my Life … Somedays are easy and most days are hard.  

Just don’t tell ’em I’ve gone crazy
That I’m still strung out over you
Tell ’em anythin’ you want to
Just don’t tell ’em all the truth
Yeah, don’t tell ’em all the truth

The truth is that I’m askin’ you to lie
And we both know that it ain’t right
But if you ever loved me
Please have some mercy on me

Tell ’em anything you want to

Yeah, don’t tell ’em all the truth
I still need you

Yeah, that’s the truth
I still love you

Baby, that’s the truth

Will I ever find it? Love, where are you? Love do you really exist?  Love look what you are doing to me.  True Love have you left me forever and are you coming back? 

Love where are you when I needed you most?  

I think it’s time to write a song … 

song credits to Journey, Jason Aldean, and Luke Combs.

Thanks for helping

People have told me I am a talented writer. I don’t know if this is true. But today I would like to share some of my feelings with you. Tonight, as I sit here watching the National Memorial Day Concert as I have done pretty much ever year I am suffering from moments of reflection. It makes me realize just how much people in this world have sacrificed to protect our way of life. But yet it goes much deeper than that. Love is called the universal language. Yet it seems to go unheeded. I see more and more anger and hatred in the world. We have become a world of entitlement, finger pointing, and deceit. Jealousy runs rampant. Oh, there are moments, rare moments of kindness. Acts of bravery go unrecognized or if they are it is only for a moment. What are we becoming? Personally and professionally. The big talk this week in the city besides making history with a new Mayor was how violent of a weekend would there be? It is a shame that such a thing even exists. I am lucky to have been a Father to four successful children and that is truly something to celebrate. Professionally I feel like I was a success as a Chicago Police Officer attaining the rank of Sergeant. I often wonder, could I have been more? Done more? Was as I as helpful as I could have been? I believed I was, but only others can be my judge. I see news reports attacking my profession with hardly a mention of all the good they do. Veterans towed the line to protect our Freedom. First responders stand united to protect our lives. They suffer as we all suffer wondering when will the madness end and why it has to exist in the first place. Personally I believed in love. The kind of love that I always thought would last forever when you love that special someone. I have seen what that kind of love could be and what happens when it leaves ones life. I have experienced it, the joys that exist when you have found it and the pain that comes when it leaves you. No one knows what tomorrow brings, well for me it’s back to work at the ballpark. While we celebrate this Memorial Day, let us not forget what got us here. Let us not forget the people that got us here. And let us pray for a better tomorrow.

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton